Day One

Today is the first day of the rest of my raw life. I am going to take things one raw meal at a time, one minute at a time if I have to. There will be more accountability here. I will slip and eat some cooked from time to time, but you'll hear about it.

I had a horrible weekend because I ate to please others so I wouldn't be "DIFFERENT". I suffered miserably for it and was humiliated. I had horrendous physical pain and struggled with stomach upset and uncontrollable gastrointestinal stuff. I could barely get off the couch and realized that there is the cooked connection to my pain.

I now believe that my ills are all related to eating crap and cooked stuff. I am ready to live my raw life in a raw and honest manner.

This morning I ate a chocolate-coconut lara bar and 10 ozzies of strawberries.

Tomorrow I will post what else I had today.

Join me on my journey to raw. I welcome your suggestions, comments and advice, but I will do in the end what is best for me as I would encourage any of you to do.

TGIF

It's Friday, y'all and I am so pumped from having a breakthrough week in this raw journey. I began by fasting, but broke my fast because I was literally starving. I prefer 'feasting'...but that doesn't mean overindulging. When I eat raw, I am sated on so much less food. It's a beautiful thing. I feel joy and peace and contentment. I feel serene.

I made some fantastic Raw Stuffed Mushrooms. I marinated baby portabellas overnight in Braggs with garlic and a smidge of red wine vinegar (you can substitute Apple Cider vinegar if you want). I then ground up 1/2 cup of raw macadamias and 1/2 cup raw walnuts for my stuffing with celtic sea salt, oregano, sweet basil, thyme, rosemary and garlic. I hand mixed it and adjusted for taste...which, right now is super-salty. It's just what I want.

I brought them to a girls' night out - my first in a long time. It was a beautiful experience, really connecting with other women and seeing that no one's that different on the inside even though, on the out side our lives, bodies or whatever might look very different.

I feel so spiritually connected to the world and to others. I'm joyous. I do have difficulties, though.

Detox is a b*tch, y'all. I have a case of the worst acne I've ever had. Ugh! Underneath, I can see fresh, clean skin so I can't wait for this to pass. My lymphedema is acting up. I went to acupuncture for relief and got a lecture about how RAW is not good for you. I shouldn't be eating raw. I need more protein to feed my circulatory system.

Ugh!

I'm down 13 lbs in three weeks. That's huge for me. It's effortless as long as I eat over 60% raw AND...gluten/dairy free. (The one exception is the Alta Dena Goat Cheese that Natalia Rose mentions in her Raw Detox Diet Book. It's yummers.)

Basically, I listen to my body and not so-called experts. I know what I need and what they need might be different. Hopefully when I get into a position where I can help others, I will be more understanding to their challenges.

I cried during my acupuncture treatment. I felt so humiliated and defeated. I questioned if what I was doing was right. I know that nothing else has worked and that grain, for me, is not the way to good health. Neither is an overabundance of meat. If I want it and really crave it, I'll give in, but it will be grilled and not a lot. Those cravings are less and less.

My raw journey will never be complete. I've had three completely raw days this week. Yay! Me!

Progress, not perfection.

Expert advice is okay, but...you've got to take it with a grain of salt and do what's best for you in the interim. I think RAW is the way to go. It's the way to go for me, but I only want to show by example and if others want to follow it, great. If not, I won't worry.

My husband and children aren't raw although they're becoming more raw-curious.

Day Two - Flush

I'm constantly changing my mind on what to do. I'm eating 100% raw until I go to the 2007 Ladies No Limit Hold'em Event at the World Series of Poker. Yup! I leave on June 9th. I'm scared to death about going. I hate to travel and I'm shy. Had to order two seats on Southwest 'cuz I'm so fat. So ashamed.

This is a business trip of sorts since I blog about poker at http://www.chicksnchips.com. I don't want to disappoint my financial backer. I'm also undertaking a regimen of poker practice and playing, reading and re-educating myself on the game.

I am having a hell of a time staying 100% raw. It's hard, y'all, but I've got to do it. I'm bringing healthy back :)

My daughter is ashamed of my weight. She always gets on me about eating right and stuff. She's only four and gets picked on school for having the fattest mom in the 'world'. I vowed I'd never be an embarrassment to my kids, but I am.

I don't like the way our society treats fat people. I feel like a pariah. It hurts. It's so painful. I'm a human being who has used food to mask her pain. I'm an addict like an alcoholic or drug addict. There's no real rehab for food addiction...unless of course you're anorexic, which I'm not.

Besides, you can't stay away from the substance. Everyone's gotta eat or they die. Sure, I know people are like...aww, boohoo the fat lady's making excuses, but...I know there are so many chemical substances that pass for food it's ridiculous.

Eating raw is getting away from those chemicals and back to sanity. It's the only way I know to get off the binge wagon and get back to me...maybe even find the real me without food as a crutch or a hindrance.

Another Flush

I've been doing 2/3 raw for a few weeks...well, 4/5 actually. Breakfast, lunch, snack and dessert has been raw. Dinner has been cooked except for this weekend when I went to the in-laws and I just broke down.

I tried bringing my own fruit, but I let them break me easily in fact. I take full responsiblity for wavering and well, I'll be better prepared next time. It's tough not having support, but I'm not the first to deal with that hurdle. I won't be the last.

Today I realized that I have to do something drastic. I have so much toxicity swimming around in my body. I've begun a three-day Lemon/Mucous fast. I am drinking a salt-water enema first thing in the AM with a bottle of Magnesium Citrate. I am also taking guaifenesin (good for my FMS and for my mucuous). I am coughing and pooping. It's great fun (haha!) just not at the same time. Thank heaven for small favors, right!


I am also drinking fresh lemon-ade. I am hand juicing two-four lemons depending upon size, using 1/4 cup of raw Texas honey and filling it with cold water. then I let it sit in the fridge, covered of course, for about an hour or more and drink.

This will be my sustenance for three days. After that, if I feel good, I'll go to five. If not, I'll break the fast with pomegranate and other fresh juices and raw fruits and veggies.

I'll try and post more here. Eventually I want to turn my experiences into a book to help other ladies and gents conquer obesity the raw way.

What is really raw today is my emotions. I'm crying and angry and sad and depressed and just overall cleansing my moods. It feels good to allow myself to feel for a change. I don't want to stuff myself up to keep my emotions in check any longer.